


Past Dreams and Current Nightmares

by AvatarAbby



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Feels, Comfort/Angst, F/F, F/M, Glimbow but it’s small, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, catradora
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:41:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26576176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvatarAbby/pseuds/AvatarAbby
Summary: Catra comforts Adora as she deals with heavy and mixed emotions.*Internalized And Religous Homophobia*
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 59





	Past Dreams and Current Nightmares

Catra turned on the engine of her car as she left work, anxiously talking with Glimmer over the phone. “What do you mean you don’t know where Adora is?”  
“What do you mean what do I mean? According to Mara, she never showed up to work today, she isn’t responding to texts from either me or Bow, and she seemed really upset when she left our weekly brunch today.”  
That was weird. When Catra and Adora had said their goodbyes this morning, the blonde had been in a rather happy mood.  
“Did anything happen at breakfast?”  
“I don’t think so,” the woman replied. “We talked about the concert we were going to go to tomorrow night and then I mentioned some of the wedding venues Bow and I were thinking about looking at.”  
The brunette physically winced at that, knowing exactly where her girlfriend was.  
————————————————————  
Catra approached the love of her life, sitting down next to her and saying, “hey Adora.”  
The blonde flinched in surprise, then quickly tried to wipe away her tears. “Hey Catra. How’d you know I’d be here?”  
“Just had a feeling. You talk about this place a lot whenever we talk about one day getting married.”  
Adora smiled sadly. “Yeah, I do.” She then turned her attention back to the building in front of her. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”  
Catra had to admit that, objectivity, the temple was beautiful, with it’s marble architecture, perfectly manicured lawn, and massive gold spires. It honestly looked like something straight out of a fairytale.  
But she knew how painful this place was to her girlfriend, how isolated and unloved it made her feel. And that made it seem a lot less fairytale-like.  
“You were supposed to get married here,” was all she said.  
Adora nodded. “To my husband, someone I would love and obey and cherish. And spend all of time and eternity with.  
“Being raised in the church, that was all I wanted for so long. It was my dream. And then I realized I was gay, and it became my worth nightmare. I imagined my life so clearly from then on- finding some man I liked but could never love, marrying him, having kids with him just because that’s what was expected of me. And I’d be miserable the whole way, knowing that deep down there was something missing in my life.”  
“You aren’t a member of the church anymore, Adora. You’re never going to have to live like that.”  
The blonde buried her face in her hands. “But I feel like I should be living like that. Catra, I love you so much- you know I love you more than anything. But I can never shake the feeling that what we are doing is wrong. Two woman living together, sleeping together, being together in the way that are, it’s just plain wrong.  
“Logically, I know that isn’t true, because every amazing thing I have in my life either comes from you or is made a million times better by you. That wouldn’t happen if this relationship wasn’t right. But I still feel so ashamed of myself.”  
“I know baby, and that breaks my heart. But I want you to know that you have nothing to be ashamed of. And I’m gonna be here for you and help you remember that in any way I can.”  
Adora sniffled, thick tears flowing down here face. “Can you... can you just hold me?”  
“Of course,” she whispered in response, holding her loved one tightly in her arms, silently assuring that she was there, she was always going to be there. 

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this more for me than anyone else. It helps me to put my feelings into a character, and that’s what I did with Adora. I come from a heavily religious background, you might even be able to tell which one if you look at the story close enough. Growing up, I couldn’t wait to get married in the temple and be with my husband forever. Then I realized I was gay and the internalized homophobia hit hard. It still does to be honest. Getting married in the temple was a dream I had to let go of, but it still stings when my friends talk about what it’s going to be like when they get married, and here I am not knowing what I’d do or how much of my family would even come. Anyway, it was nice to pass my problems onto someone else for a while, and I thank anyone who read this work.


End file.
